A blog. Why a blog about grieving? We just lost our precious son less than 3 weeks ago. Should I be doing this? What purpose will it serve? Will it even serve a purpose?
In our narcissistic society, is it just something else to draw attention to oneself? We take pictures of our food, our feet, our pets, and document every event of our lives. But grief…isn’t that a private thing? Should I grieve out loud, in front of the world? Should I let people in to see the ugliness, the despair, the hope?
Sometimes, there is a disconnect between my head and my heart. That is why I write. When I put ‘pen to paper’ it helps the truths I know in my head, to penetrate my heart. There is less than 12 inches in distance between the two, (my brian and my heart), and yet, sometimes it takes miles of the written word, truths I believe, to make their way to the depths of my heart and soul. Writing it down, meditating on it, reading it out loud, again and again, helps these truths to find their way from head knowledge to life living, life giving truths. I want the truths that I know, to be reflected in my life, so I write them down, commit them to memory, and remind myself everyday I believe them!
So, I will take this journey, in front of the world and attempt to journal ‘out loud’ as I walk thru the darkest days I have ever known. If you are going to journey with me, I must warn you. Somedays, you are bound to find despair, anger, anguish, sould crushing heartache, and unanswerable questions. But it is my prayer that you will also find joy, trust beyond circumstances, a comfort and peace that transcends understanding, and hope.