regrets

Regrets. They are so painful. Oh, the things I wish I could go back and do differently. They sometimes haunt me in the middle of the night, when sleep won’t come. I lay there in the dark recalling the harsh tones, when I wasn’t getting the respect I thought I deserved. The anger, when things weren’t going my way. Losing my temper, for what now seems utterly ridiculous reasons. The countless times I didn’t believe the best but rather jumped to ungodly judgement. All of the times I was crossing something else off of my to-do list, when I should have been playing Legos.

Regrets, trying to eat the happiness out of my memories. Regrets, making this even more painful, if that’s even possible. Regrets, working up despair, because there are no do-overs. No, I must live with them. My regrets are a part of my life now. But they will not control me. I will not let them define who I am. And I will not look at them apart from the cross where I am forgiven. Dwelling on the past when you can’t go back and fix it, only poisons the future. Therefore, I will only look at you, regret, when standing in the shadow of the cross of Christ.

And regret, you do not have the last word. You will not eat me up. I, in fact, will use you.  Regret, I will use you to prod me into doing better with those still living. Regret, I will use you to remind me to grasp every moment and see the beauty in the small, seemingly insignificant things. Regret, you are teaching me to treasure every moment, and endure trials with patients and a soft, trusting heart. Regret, you are teaching me to value what God values most and put the eternal endeavors first on my to-do list. And best of all, regret, you have intensified my hope for that Great Day coming, when we can all throw ourselves into each other’s arms and rejoice, because there will be no more regrets!

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3 Responses to regrets

  1. Judi Schleiden says:

    Amen! Done with regrets! Onto living a positive life and not allowing regrets to steal your victory in Christ! Well said my dear. We all have regrets but do you see, Satan is ragging a war against your victory. Show him who’s boss!!!! 😉 There was a chorus from my childhood, wish I could sing it to you so the words will have to do. “Get thee behind me Satan, get thee away. I don’t want anything to do with you today! Get thee behind me Satan, get thee away. I wanna be a Christian soldier and I want to learn to pray”. Pray, pray, pray sweetie! God hears those prayers and don’t forget to rebuke Satan in Jesus name!

    • Alisa says:

      Love you guys. And these encouraging words always bring such comfort ❤

      • Judi Schleiden says:

        Alisa, They were words placed on my heart by God as I had been struggling with some of the very same issues in our family. It’s amazing how God speaks to our own hearts and ears when we are sharing encouraging words to others! I love it!!! I keep reminding myself that others can be a vehicle of Satan but I am not going to let them rob me of my joy! Couldn’t stop praying for you yesterday as you faced Grant’s birthday and then receiving his ashes! Love you guys too and are praying constantly for God to send joy, peace, strength and wisdom for your days.

        Psalm 46:10 & 11
        10 He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;
        I will be exalted among the nations,
        I will be exalted in the earth.”

        11 The Lord Almighty is with us;
        the God of Jacob is our fortress.

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