I stood at the stove when I heard her soft voice behind me, “Mom, I wrote another poem. Can I read it to you?” she asked with glossy eyes. She’s been writing poetry, our precious 16 year old, Grant’s little sister, to help her walk this road of suffering. She writes to Grant, she writes to God, she writes for her eyes only. And sometimes she’s able to share.
I set down my spoon, walked over to the kitchen island, and nodded, “Of course, I want to hear it very much.” I braced myself and listened intently as she read, tears silently streaming…
Memories: Fear of Fading
Scared, more and more, Shivering down to my core. One fear grips me, Relentless, in won’t let me free.
The comforting weight of memories, My heart carries, at all times. What if they go away? Constantly coaxing my mind to make them stay.
Like a full tree in the beginning of fall, The memories driven away with winters call. Can I make them stay, If I kneel, ask, and pray?
I shake as winter comes, Wind threatening, my full tree hums. Leaves falling one by one, Memories like leaves, will they fall away until they’re none?
I lay still, Forcing my memory by sheer will, As the tree begins to fade, I pray some leaves will stay.
Clinging to the branches, refusing to let go, Some to share, some no one will know. Some good and some bad, And so many funny, that were had.
What comes next? Bright Spring, says the text. With spring comes new leaves, It’s the plan God weaves.
New leaves of green, Soft, budding, serene. But none like the old, For all was changed by winter’s cold.
The leaves keep growing, As they must, says the All Knowing. I beg the fall leaves to stay, Gathering, preserving, not wanting to make way.
Please God keep them alive, Forever, eternally, help them to survive. I would trade them for nothing, Not even for spring, and the new leaves it brings.